Things I'll never say
by Cherry tiger
Summary: Sakuno writes on her diary about her day out with Ryoma (episode 24)! Coupled with Avril Lavigne's "Things I'll never say". Ryosaku?


My first Prince of Tennis fic! I'm slightly worried, after all, not many people like Sakuno because she's such a weak character and the series doesn't seem to portray her very well. But I'm really hoping things will get better for her, cause I'm cheering for her and Ryoma!  
  
Hope you guys like it! C&C welcome!  
  
Disclaimer: As if I own them... (sigh)

* * *

Dear diary,  
  
Yup, the day finally arrived. The day when I went to get my racquet restringed at Haritatsu's... with Ryoma-kun! I spent the whole morning going through my closet, searching for something nice to wear. I really couldn't decide! I know, anything would do... but this is Ryoma-kun! I was going to go out with Ryoma-kun!  
  
_I'm tugging at my hair _

_I'm pulling out my clothes _

_I'm trying to keep my cool  
  
I know it shows...  
_  
Well, in the midst of my search, Tomo-chan called inviting me over. I told her the truth... and for the next half hour I had to hear Tomoka's whining about how she wished she could come. She kept saying it was a date! Isn't that absurd? Well, thanks to her, I was definitely late. I had to wear the closest thing near me and I ran all the way to the train station, panicking. What if he left because I was late? I almost cried when I couldn't find him in the train station... only to be surprised when he came behind me, carrying his racquet. I apologized immediately, but he didn't seem to notice. In fact, as we walked to Haritatsu's, he seemed to be keeping his distance from me. I kept looking down and sighing... I kept feeling like it was all my fault, diary... If only I wasn't late...  
  
_I'm staring at my feet _

_My cheeks are turning red_

_I'm trying to find the words  
  
Inside my head...  
_  
After what seemed like forever to me, we finally reached Haritatsu's place. The place looked really old, and it didn't look very inviting but Ryoma-kun went in, so I went in, too. The place wasn't as scary as I thought, and Haritatsu turned out to be a very nice man. He seemed to have understood me a little just by looking at my racquet. It was really interesting. He seems to know Ryoma-kun a lot, though... but he talked especially about a man named Nanjiroh. I think he's talking about Ryoma-kun's father... but I'm not sure.  
  
Well, Haritatsu asked us to go for a walk because it would take some time before my racquet was restringed. It turned out to be the worst moment ever, diary... He still kept his pace! I tried to strike up a conversation but it looked like he wasn't interested. Ah, it was really, really hard...  
  
_I'm feeling nervous _

_Trying to be so perfect _

_Cause I know you're worth it _

_You're worth it, yeah...  
  
If I can say what I wanna say _

_I say I wanna blow away _

_Be with you every night _

_Am I squeezing you too tight? _

_If I can say what I wanna see _

_I wanna see you go down with me _

_Marry me today _

_Guess I'm wishing my life away _

_These are things I'll never say  
_  
I couldn't stand the silence for long. I knew I couldn't always stay behind him and not say anything. This was my only chance to know Ryoma-kun better... so I decided to be like Tomo-chan and try to strike up a conversation. So I ran in front of him, stopped him and asked what was his favourite music. A question I thought that was very simple.  
  
But Ryoma-kun always has a way to make whatever I do look bad to him...  
  
_It don't do me any good _

_It's just a waste of time _

_What use is it to you _

_What's on my mind?  
_  
He said that I was talking too much. He actually said that I was talking too much. Unable to control my emotions, I ran. A stupid thing, I know, diary. But I cry too easily, and I didn't want him to see me cry out of a stupid reason.  
  
But running away seemed like another reason for Ryoma-kun to hate me...  
  
_I feel it coming out _

_We're not going anywhere_

_ So why can't I just tell you _

_That I care?  
_  
_Cause I'm feeling nervous _

_Trying to be so perfect _

_Cause I know you're worth it _

_You're worth it, yeah...  
  
If I can say what I wanna say _

_I say I wanna blow you away _

_Be with you every night _

_Am I squeezing you too tight? _

_If I can say what I wanna see _

_I wanna see you go down with me _

_Marry me today _

_Guess I'm wishing my life away _

_These things I'll never say  
_  
After a while, reality sunk in and I knew it was stupid of me to run. I mean, Ryoma-kun was Ryoma-kun, he probably never wanted to come with me anyway so it's not his fault if he didn't want to talk to me. I felt so guilty for running away, but I couldn't understand the feelings that were stirring in me. I looked up at the sky, hoping that someone could forgive my rash actions.  
  
_What's wrong with my tongue? _

_These words keep slipping away _

_I stutter, I stumble _

_Like I've got nothing to say  
_  
Then he came, holding a can of Ponta in his hand. He gave it to me, and we stood there, not saying a word. I slowly sipped the Ponta and slowly felt better. For the atmosphere now seemed less tense. And somehow, being next to Ryoma-kun... just being next to him, was all it took to make me realize that he wasn't angry with me. And I was glad...  
  
_Cause I'm feeling nervous _

_Trying to be so perfect _

_Cause I know you're worth it _

_You're worth it, yeah...  
_  
After a while we went back to Haritatsu's to get back my racquet. It was only after we left the place did I find out why Ryoma-kun brought his racquet without wanting it to be restringed. He wanted to check my form! It would've been great, trying to play tennis with the Prince of Tennis, but if only I didn't fall down so much and embarrassed myself a lot. But it was great!  
  
I just wished it didn't end so soon...  
  
_Guess I'm wishing my life away _

_These things I'll never say  
  
If I can say what I wanna say_

_I say I wanna blow you away _

_Be with you every night _

_Am I squeezing you too tight? _

_If I can say what I wanna see _

_I wanna see you go down with me _

_Marry me today _

_Guess I'm wishing my life away  
_  
We went home pretty much as usual. We said nothing about today... in fact, we didn't say anything at all. It wasn't that bad, maybe a little disappointing, but...  
  
_These things I'll never say _

_These things I'll never say...  
_  
It's definitely a day I won't forget, diary!  
  
Sakuno.


End file.
